


(You know) I give my lover a four letter name

by stardustachilles



Series: Acosmist (one who believes nothing exists) [4]
Category: Dysprosium
Genre: Alex and James know German, Alex is 24, Art Museums, Bad Cooking, Discussion of relationships, F/F, Fluff, Friendship, Sara is 17
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-07
Updated: 2017-02-07
Packaged: 2018-09-22 18:51:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply, Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,713
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9620903
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stardustachilles/pseuds/stardustachilles
Summary: Alex takes Sara on a date to an art museum.





	

Sara got to Alex’s house on Friday after school, opening the unlocked door and dropping her backpack in the entrance way and wandering down through the open doors into the living room and  down the hallway to the kitchen, where she heard voices and the clattering of plates.

Alex was sitting on the counter with a spoon in her mouth, and James was standing over the oven, cooking something. Sara didn’t know James very well yet, but he seemed kind, and he obviously loved Alex. Sara knew they had grown up together, and that James had followed Alex all over the country whenever she moved. They had a connection that Alex and Sara would probably never have, but Sara couldn’t be jealous, because she didn’t need their connection. She and Alex would form their own.

Alex jumped off the counter when she saw Sara, dropping the spoon in the sink and wrapping Sara in her arms. Sara hugged back, sighing into Alex’s collarbone. Alex was warm, and the sweater she was wearing was soft against Sara’s cheek.

“Hey,” Alex greeted, pecking Sara on the lips. She tasted like peanut butter. That was probably what had been on the spoon.

“Hey,” Sara greeted back with a smile. James turned and smiled at her, and stretched out a fist for her to bump. She bumped it.

Alex hopped back on the counter, pulling Sara by the hand to stand between her legs. She wrapped her arms around Sara’s stomach and set her chin on Sara’s shoulder. “I’m pretty sure he’s frying peanut butter to put on PB&J’s,” Alex said, tilting her head toward James. Sara shouldn’t have been surprised. James liked frying all kinds of food.

Sara snorted and leaned back against Alex. “That sounds disgusting,” she said. “Are you actually going to eat that?”

Alex barked out a laugh. “God, no. I don’t trust him to feed me anymore.” James made an offended noise, but he didn’t turn around, still stirring whatever was in the pan. “I made a rule a while ago that whatever he makes, he has to eat.”

“That sounds like a good rule,” Sara said, knocking her head gently against Alex’s.

“It’s a terrible rule,” James input, “but I will accept my fate.” He nodded solemnly.

Alex laughed at him and shouted something in what sounded like German, because both she and James had taken German in college. James laughed and shouted something back, and it sounded even meaner, but that was probably just because it was in German.

Sara was fine with not knowing what they were saying. She had no desire to learn German, and she knew their relationship was important to each other, and that meant Sara would sometimes third wheel. Even if she was dating Alex. It was okay. James was no threat to their relationship; he was like Alex’s brother.

They were quiet for a few moments, watching James cook before Alex turned Sara around with hands on her ribs, warm even through Sara’s sweatshirt. She smiled, and bumped her nose against Sara’s. “So,” she started, and Sara smiled, too.

“So,” she repeated, or agreed.

Alex pecked her lips again, resting her forehead against Sara’s for a second. She pulled back to look Sara in the eyes, and Sara’s hands were resting on the counter beside Alex’s hips. “So,” Alex said again. “I was wondering if you wanted to go out with me tonight.” It wasn’t a question, it was a statement, because Alex had been wondering and it wasn’t like Sara was going to say no. She was at Alex’s tonight and tomorrow morning, because her parents thought she was at Hayden’s.

“Really?” Sara asked. Alex took her out all the time, but Sara was still surprised each time. She wasn’t used to people liking her, beside her group of friends, and her parents didn’t usually take her places. She could drive, but she didn’t have a car, so she had to take a bus.

“A new art exhibit opened downtown yesterday,” Alex said. “I have tickets. You want to go?” Her eyes were flicking back and forth between Sara’s, searching for an answer.

“I’d love to go,” Sara enthused. “I heard about that when it opened, and I was going to ask Hayden to take me or something, but this is great. Yeah, I’d love to go.”

Alex laughed cheerfully and kissed Sara again. “Good,” she said. “You’ll have to take off the sweatshirt, though. It’s not exactly appropriate for an art exhibit. Just your uniform should be fine, unless you want to change, then I have some clothes upstairs. I’ll be changing, too.” Sara looked down at what Alex was wearing, which happened to be one of James’s sweaters and her exercise leggings. She also had on fuzzy socks, which were out of place in her warm house.

“What time?” Sara asked, because she had some homework that she was probably going to ask Alex to help her with.

“Nine,” Alex answered. “We’ll eat dinner before we go. It closes at midnight.”

“Cool,” Sara nodded. She rested her temple against Alex’s shoulder, tucking her nose into Alex’s neck. She could feel the corded muscle of Alex’s shoulder beneath her, even through the sweater. Alex’s arm and shoulder flexed as she brought her right arm up to cradle the back of Sara’s neck, and the other one came up to wrap around Sara’s back.

They stood that way until James finished making their dinner, and he ended up not only making the weird fried peanut butter, but some spaghetti and meatballs, too. They sat at the little table in the front to eat, by the big windows. Alex sat in the middle, holding Sara’s hand under the table, and she made amicable conversation with James, making an effort to include Sara.

They finished dinner and James did the dishes — he kind of seemed like the housewife, here — while Alex helped Sara with her homework. Before she had met Alex, Sara had regretted taking physics this year, but now she actually mostly understood what she was doing.

They finished around seven, and they didn’t have to leave until eight forty-five, and it took half an hour to get ready, so Sara convinced Alex to make out with her for an hour and fifteen minutes. (It was awesome.)

Sara tried to suppress a groan as Alex bit her bottom lip, left hand pinned, seemingly unthinkingly, beside her head. Her right hand was wedged behind her back against the bed, where Alex had put it earlier. Sara’s legs were trapped beneath Alex’s, and she pretty much couldn’t move. (It was awesome.)

An alarm went off of Alex’s phone from the nightstand, indicating that it was now eight fifteen and they better start getting ready unless they wanted to be late. Alex was really good at time management, but it was really annoying sometimes.

She pressed one last kiss to Sara’s lips, sliding their tongues together one more time. Then she pulled back and stood up, leaving Sara dazed and a little turned on, frozen against the bed. Sara groaned in disappointment but sat up, brushing her hair back into some semblance of acceptable. It didn’t really work.

Alex shucked James’s sweater and the leggings off, pulling on jeans that were artfully ripped at the knee and rolled at the ankle, and a loose black long sleeve t-shirt with a deep scooping neckline. She flipped her hair up into a bun and slid in pearl earrings, looking sinfully beautiful in casual clothing.

Sara stood, tugging off her school sweatshirt and digging through Alex’s drawers for a shirt that didn’t have her school’s logo on it. She came up with a blue button-down with a soft rounded collar, but only in the front. She tucked it into her school skirt, and readjusted her tights. Her combat boots were down stairs.

Alex came up behind Sara and reached around her to open her jewelry box and get a necklace, since the earrings had been sitting on her bookshelf. She grabbed a gold necklace with a circle at the end of the chain and pulled back from Sara to put it on. It baffled Sara, the casual display of comfort and somewhat of affection.

Sara was curious by nature, so she used the end of a fingernail to dig through the different things in there. She saw a necklace made completely of diamonds that were probably real, and a bunch of other precious gems that probably cost more than the house they were in. The necklace Alex was wearing was probably real gold, too.

Uncharacteristically, Sara found a velvet choker tucked into the back of one of the drawers. It was one of the ones you could buy at a department store, and it looked worn but well maintained, unlike the rest of Alex’s expensive, pristine jewelry.

“What’s this?” she asked, holding it up by an end.

Alex turned around from whatever she was doing, and her eyes focused on the choker. “Oh,” Alex said, a flicker of emotions across her face like she couldn’t decide on one. Which was also uncharacteristic. “That.”

Sara raised her eyebrows, waiting for an explanation. She wasn’t even mad; just curious.

“It… I bought it for an ex,” she said. Sara collected it in a hand and sat down on the bed, ready to listen. She set her chin in a hand and motioned for Alex to continue. “It’s kind of complicated, but the simple version is that I was already… uh, into, y’know… and she wasn’t, but she wanted to learn. So I bought it for her instead of a collar, because we were in high school, and she just kind of left it when we broke up, and I never go rid of it.”

“Oh,” Sara said, not bad, not good. Just informed. “Will you… put it on me?” She held it up again, and Alex walked over to her slowly.

She took it from Sara’s hand and cradled it in her palm. She stared at it. They both knew the implications of Alex putting the choker on her, but Sara had asked anyway.

“Are you sure?” Alex asked. She fiddled with the end of the velvet. “You know what this would mean, right?”

Sara tucked her legs beneath her, looking up at Alex. “I know,” she said. She reached up to place her hand on Alex’s wrist. “Please?”

Alex stared at her next. They had talked about these things maybe a month ago, and Alex had put it in Sara’s hands. Now Sara was asking.

Sara lifted her hair, spinning around on the bed. Alex’s hands descended in front of her face, cradling the ends of the choker gently. She clasped it around Sara’s neck, not too loose, not too tight, and it was… comfortable. Natural. Sara liked it.

She stood up, standing in front of Alex. It emphasized how much shorter Sara was than her. Sara set her hands on Alex’s hips and gently laid her head on Alex’s chest. She felt Alex’s hands come up to cradle her, one hand between her shoulder blades and the other on the clasp of the choker over her hair.

“We’re talking about this later,” Alex said, voice a hairsbreadth away from thick. This probably meant more to her than it did to Sara, but it would come to mean that much to Sara, in time. But for now, Sara let Alex hold her, until another alarm on Alex’s phone went of that told them that it was time to leave.

She grabbed the messenger bag that she usually carried and flung open the door to her room, motioning to Sara to follow her. Sara ran to catch up and grabbed Alex’s hand. Alex paused at the top of the stairs to pull Sara in and press a firm kiss to her lips, and Sara blushed, because they were right by a window and anyone could see them. Alex just laughed at her, because she knew what she was thinking, and kissed the tip of her nose.

They padded down the stairs, and Sara grabbed a book off of the shelf at the bottom to put in Alex’s bag, just in case. James was in the living room, on the couch with something that looked like a cat, but could have also been a bag of chips. It was hard to tell with James. He turned his head to say goodbye, but stood suddenly.

The — now identified — bag of chips fell onto the couch, miraculously not spilling. Sara didn’t know why, but Alex obviously did. She and James were exchanging rapid looks, one in ten at Sara. She couldn’t decipher what they were saying; it was practically a different language.

“Alex…” James said, tone indecipherable.

Alex shot him a sharp look, and snapped, “Later.” 

James nodded, and said, “I probably won’t be here when you get back.” He sat back down, not waiting for Alex’s confirmation.

Alex pulled Sara out of the door, not bothering to pull the double doors closed behind her. In the entryway, she and Sara slipped on their shoes, and they went out the front door, which Sara closed behind them, because Alex probably wasn’t going to. They walked to the curb where Alex’s Camaro was parked, because the Jeep was in the garage with James’s 2017 Chevrolet Impala.

Alex climbed in the driver’s seat and flipped the engine, waiting for Sara to get in and buckle before she pulled away. Sara liked driving in the Camaro, because it was quick and had incredible power steering, and because it was automatic, which meant Alex claimed her hand almost the entire time she drove.

They made their way out of the residential unit and the sparsely populated neighborhood where Alex lived. Sara rested her head against the window and watched the similarly structured houses pass by. She knew James lived around here somewhere, but she didn’t know exactly where. It was far enough that it was faster to drive than to walk, but close enough that he could be there within eight minutes. He didn’t like to share much about himself.

Alex’s music was playing softly, something in German that only she could understand. It was soft and melodic, and Sara could enjoy it despite it behind in a different language. She usually only listened to the music for the lyrics, and sometimes the tune, but she liked Alex’s music. It was comforting, almost.

Sara stretched her neck, just to feel the pressure of her choker against her neck. Alex’s eyes caught the movement, and her eyes flicked off the road for a second. Her brow furrowed, for a reason Sara didn’t know. She hoped it was good. Maybe it wasn’t.

Sara lifted her head and raised her eyebrows in response. Alex’s eyes were back on the road, but Sara knew that she had seen. Alex huffed like she was about to speak, but didn’t, then readjusted her hand on the wheel. The hand holding Sara’s flexed. “What is it?” Sara asked.

“Nothing…” Alex hesitated. “Natalia used to do the same thing.” Her hand flexed again and she shifted a little bit in her seat, uncomfortable.

“Natalia,” Sara repeated. She tried to keep the jealousy out of her voice, and pulled her knees up to her chest and wrapped her free arm around them. “Your ex.”

“Yeah,” Alex confirmed. “She’s my ex. It was a long time ago. You have nothing to worry about. I’m pretty sure she’s in San Francisco, now. You have no reason to be jealous.” Alex hand squeezed her’s reassurance.

“I believe you,” Sara said. She pulled Alex’s hand up and kissed her knuckles. “I’m not jealous. You’ve just never mentioned anyone else before, and it threw me off guard.”

Alex shot her a look, but said dubiously, “Alright. If you’re sure.”

“I’m sure,” Sara confirmed. “What did she look like?”

Alex grabbed her phone out of the cup holder and typed the passcode in without looking. Sara didn’t know it, because Alex had told her that some of the messages she received from her job were confidential. Which was why her email was also password protected, and you couldn’t see what her texts said unless you opened them all the way. Sara had gotten a glance of one before, and it looked pretty serious. She wasn’t even offended that James got to know the passcode to Alex’s phone.

Alex handed the phone to Sara, and said, “Pull up the photos, and go to the ‘Faces’ album.” Sara did, and got a glimpse of a complicated looking document in Alex’s recent photos. But she opened the ‘Faces’ folder. Alex said, “It was sometime in August, about seven years ago. Should be the only one from that month in the folder without James in it.”

Sara followed her instructions, and found a picture of a younger looking Alex, though her face hadn’t changed much, and another girl. Alex had her hair in a bun and flawless makeup, wearing big pink long sleeve shirt that was probably James’s, and patterned leggings. The girl beside her Sara assumed to be Natalia, a cute mixed-looking girl in a jean jacket. Her dark, curly hair was in two Princess-Leia buns on either side of her head, and she, too, had flawless makeup. Sara wished she could be that good at makeup.

In the picture, Natalia was squeezing Alex’s cheeks together, and Alex was holding up a peace sign in front of Natalia’s throat, so she couldn’t be sure if Natalia was wearing the choker. Alex could probably tell her. They looked to be sitting on a bridge of some sort, with Alex’s legs seemingly resting over Natalia’s. The sky behind them was dark blue.

Alex looked over at Sara studying the picture. “James took it,” she said. We had gone out to eat that night, us three and some other friends, and had wandered around the more sparsely populated parts of town like the rambunctious teenagers we were. I was seventeen, I think.”

“She’s pretty,” Sara said.

“Yeah,” Alex said quietly. “She is.”

They were quiet for awhile, and Sara asked, “Why did you break up?”

Alex sighed. “We had our time. We both knew it wasn’t going to last forever. I was just her teacher, mostly. We trusted each other well enough for her to learn. And about a semester before we graduated, we broke up. It was cordial. We were still friends afterward. But we lost touch after graduation, because she moved out to California, and I moved around a bit.”

Sara was quiet, processing the information. She wasn’t jealous. She was just curious. Sara knew Alex had been in relationships before, and she knew she would get even just a little bit jealous if it was brought up. But she, almost surprisingly, was secure in her relationship, and she knew Alex would tell her if something was wrong and they would talk it out. “But you don’t have any feelings for her anymore?” Sara asked demurely, a smirk curling at the corners of her mouth. She squeezed Alex’s hand.

Alex laughed, and squeezed Sara’s hand back. “It was seven years ago. I don’t have feelings for her.” This time she kissed Sara’s knuckles, not taking her eyes off the road.

A couple minutes later they pulled up to the Gilchrist Gallery. There were cars parked along the curb, because it was in an old colonial house in the historic section of town and it didn’t have a parking lot. Alex parallel parked in a free spot, and hopped out of the car. Sara followed her and grabbed her hand, linking their fingers.

The front door to the house was propped open, and there was classical music coming from inside. She could see people through the door, dressed in the same kind of style as her — a lot of skirts and tights. There were more heels, though, than combat boots, like Sara’s. Alex was in Converse, and despite her outfit, she looked like the fanciest person there.

Alex let Sara lead her around from room to room by a hand, because Alex had no interest in art that wasn’t rocket designs and Sara had no interest in art that was rocket designs. Sara knew Alex generally hated art museums, and she’d never go to one without a reason, so Sara felt appropriately appreciated, knowing that Alex was here for her.

Sara stood for minutes upon minutes staring at individual paintings, and Alex stood quietly behind her, with a hand on her hip and the other still linked with Sara’s. They didn’t talk much, and Alex read the histories of the paintings beside the frames. She made witty comments when she felt like it, always making Sara smile and sometimes blush, if she was lucky. Sara liked how much effort Alex was putting into not being bored.

Sara knew Alex liked excitement. Alex like fast cars and fast conversations and sharp turns and sharp tongues. She like verbal fights, although Sara had learned from James that she had pretty much stopped the physical fights since she got out of high school. Alex had gone to a private school, and she would have gotten kicked out if she had been caught. Alex liked not getting caught. She was really good at it, too.

But she was putting effort into being interested in paintings of rocks and rivers, for Sara, and Sara liked it. She liked Alex. She liked how much Alex liked her. She leaned back into Alex a little, still staring at the same painting she’d been staring at for the past three minutes. It as of a rocky cliffside and the ocean at night, under the full moon. Sara didn’t know who had done it, because she hadn’t bothered to read the plaque beside it yet, but she loved it.

Both of Alex’s arms wrapped around Sara’s waist, not unlinking their fingers. Sara tipped her head back against Alex’s shoulder, which worked perfectly with their height difference. Alex’s lips ghosted over the column of her neck and she shivered, but this wasn’t the place, or the time. Alex’s arms were warm across her stomach, and Sara was content.


End file.
